October 27, 2009

Blogging is FUN...

Posted by Ams at 10/27/2009 08:01:00 PM 1 nailing

...If there are people to read what you write!!! This is something that I realized so late. I thought I blogged for my own satisfaction but how wrong was I because every time I open my page i look at the right hand side of the page to check on the Feedjit as to see did any people visit (not read) my page after I logged out. So that makes it clear that I am happy when people visit me. So I take this chance to thank every one who visited my page and I would also like to tell you all to stay here as long as you wish because you are who make me want to blog again (woooosh, I have admitted that at last!)

So it might be interesting for you to know what has been happening in my life lately. Well, I had a big surprise in wait for me this month which I was totally unaware of (of course I know surprises are unawares,I just mentioned it to make you curious). The month bloomed as usual, October with all its cool dewy mornings and hot humid days and me getting up, dressing up, riding up to my office! Well, that's the usual! So on Oct 12th, I was feeling a bit down about going to office, so thought will sit at home and work, yeah, that's an advantage that I have at my work and that's what I love about my work. So all bedraggled from last night's sleep (you dare not imagine me that way, mind it!) I booted my system and started working. By 11 o'clock the power supply and internet started to alternately come and go. I got so upset that I got ready to go to office itself rather than wasting my time and energy sitting and restarting the computer! Then I had an afterthought, why not make use of the opportunity to take a good break and cool off for some time till the power and internet stabilizes. Okay, so I decided to do so, called the office and told them there is problem over at home, so I am waiting for things to settle! Just a few minutes after the phone call, I heard the postman's bell ringing and my mother was running to receive something and then she called my name aloud (for I was perched upstairs in my den). So I ran down and he gave me an envelope that had come through speed post. I wondered what was that and lo, it was then that I saw the logo in front of the cover! I was stormed for sure but I was also suspicious as to what it might contain. Anyway, I signed it and ran inside the house yelling 'amma, it's from X Ltd.' (let that be a secret for now). Amma also was surprised. I tore open the envelope to see that I was asked to come for the final medical checkup before entering the company for which I had attended an interview at Hyderabad and had lost all hopes of getting that job when the result had been published. But I don't know how this happened, maybe God hasn't left me to fight alone. So I was overjoyed, my amma began to cry, and many melodramatic things happened. I went for the medical test that week itself, was certified fit by the doctor and finally I am waiting for the confirmation letter from the company.

So there ends my quest for a better job. Now I am sad that all the books that I had bought after I knew I was out of the selected candidates for X Ltd. just to ensure that I get a better place the next time I go for a test and interview has all gotten blown. Now the books are lying in front of me but I feel lazy to touch them but I have to because even though am 99% sure about this job, I shouldn't stop trying for the good opportunities that come my way, I am having two exams next month, so am probably hoping to touch the books soon.

This month I also had to take a brash move against S. He had visited my town after a long time and I purposely avoided him because I don't know why, but today, I don't hold the attraction that I had held for him in the yester years . Sometimes I loathe the way he talks and the way he shows off about his job and blah-blah. Last week, he had called me saying he wanted to come home and see me. I made excuses of plans to visit my cousin's home and evaded him. He called thrice to know when I might be available, but I made myself unavailable and I think he will be on his journey back to Mumbai by now. I did such a hateful act because there is no use of pursuing situations or making someone pursue situations which don't deliver the goods that you desire (you know what I mean). I have learned the simple fact of life from all these years of living, and that is to say "NO" when you really really don't want it in your life, be it a person, a situation, or whatever you think is unjustifiable to your conscience.

I got a request the week before from a friend that I have mentioned here before. He wanted me to sent him the song, hearing which he had fallen head over heals for me, in my own voice. The song is "Chaha he Tujhko" from Mann. I have half-agreed to sing it for him because it's been a long time since I sang for someone. He is a precious person, I do miss him but I don't want to move to his side because I know eventually I will be hurting his feelings because I don't nurture the same feelings that he has for me. So today, I just brushed off my headphone's mic but unfortunately (for him!!!) my mic is out of order!!! Hoooohahaha, now I will have to get a head fone from office and then sing it for him, now that is sure gonna take some time, so you will have to patiently wait for it, dude!!

What else, so that's the briefing on what has been going on with me that I wanted to write here since the surprise letter that I received. So till I see you all next time, Happy Blogging !!

October 22, 2009

True to the Core!!!

Posted by Ams at 10/22/2009 11:51:00 AM 0 nailing



Your Five Variable Love Profile



Propensity for Monogamy:



Your propensity for monogamy is medium.

In general, you prefer to have only one love interest.

But it's hard for you to stay devoted for too long!

There's too much eye candy to keep you from wandering.



Experience Level:



Your experience level is high.

You've loved, lost, and loved again.

You have had a wide range of love experiences.

And when the real thing comes along, you know it!



Dominance:



Your dominance is low.

This doesn't mean you're a doormat, just balanced.

You know a relationship is not about getting your way.

And you love to give your sweetie a lot of freedom.



Cynicism:



Your cynicism is medium.

You'd like to believe in true and everlasting love...

But you've definitely been burned enough to know better.

You're still an optimist, but you also are a realist.



Independence:



Your independence is high.

You don't need to be in love, and sometimes you don't even want love.

Having your own life is very important for you...

Even more important than having a relationship.




I didn't imagine this quiz would turn out with so many self-analyzed facts !!! It truly portrays my concept of the much hashed out feeling "Love" !

October 03, 2009

I wish...

Posted by Ams at 10/03/2009 05:15:00 PM 0 nailing

I wish someone would tell me something incredibly profound. I wish my heart would beat beat beat in time with theirs and things I want to say wouldn’t get caught in my throat like my hair gets caught in my fingers and ties itself into knots. I wish the voice in my head didn’t say the things it does, because of all the people I can trust in the world I shouldn’t be one of them. That’s why I listen to music louder than the sounds of the late-night television programs like poker competitions and bad films starring bad actors. And in the middle of the cacophony of sounds the only thoughts I can hear are the singer’s, the whisperer’s, the poet’s, infinitely better and wiser. Wiser even than the stars. I bet they don’t trust themselves either. I bet lots of people don’t when they’ve fallen down the rabbit hole and felt a heartbreak or three. Boys didn’t break my heart you know, I did. I break it all the time. I’m breaking it right now and I don’t even know why.

Adopted from Tumbler




October 02, 2009

Are you afraid of death?

Posted by Ams at 10/02/2009 04:36:00 PM 0 nailing

Okay, so again I have took the help of Creativity portal for today's post. It's not because there was nothing to write about but it was because I wanted to write about something that's no-nonsense, something other than my random thoughts. So I chose this and what I got was "Am I afraid of death?"

Before I started writing this, I did a bit of research as to the exact day of my death. I know that was something foolish of me, but anyway, I did it. Now, my buddies, don't ever mistake me. I am not afraid of death, truly, really, am not. Yeah, so my answer to the above question is already in front of you. I know there are many among us who are afraid to die but there might be several reasons behind that and I do respect those reasons. For me, death is the beginning of an unknown realm which we are to tread compulsorily. So why be afraid. Were we afraid to be born on earth? No idea. Were we afraid to live on this earth? Definitely, yes. I am still afraid to live on this earth. Fear comes in all forms when I consider "how will I live till my last breath." This might sound ridiculous to you, but really, one doesn't know what lies ahead, so one has to be afraid. But in the case of death, that doesn't happen. Once we die, it won't be this same, it won't be like will I be able to look after myself? Will I have the money to live a beautiful life forever? Will I be healthy till the end of my life? will I be able to find my love? will I be able to have kids? Will I be able to live without meeting a road accident? Will I be able to cook tasty food for my hubby? Will I be?Will I be?? These are all the horrors that lie ahead, but once we die am sure we needn't worry about such things and hope there won't be a life after death.

Actually, Death' is the greatest enigma in life. It has baffled humankind from times out of mind. And yet despite all attempts to solve the mystery, it has remained as mysterious as ever before. I do have confusions in my mind as to what is death. Do we really die, or do we have a soul that lives on apart from the body? For every living being, death is shocking and unexpected. Even for me, that moment when I die will be shocking even if am not afraid of death. Can we pinpoint just what death is? Do we have immortal souls? Are we conscious after we die? Are we destined to go somewhere to experience some form of reward or punishment? What is really going to happen when we die? It's not fear that you can feel in these questions, it's anticipation or curiosity or excitement about the unknown. That's what death means for me. A journey from known to unknown.

I would like to think of death as a journey into a peaceful kingdom where nothing worries you or ails you. So if anybody who is reading this is afraid of death, just read the The Letter from Heaven and be a changed man...

Love you all my bloggie buddies...
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